It's Friday and here is your picture of the day:
There is a nice lavender fog sitting on Santa Monica Bay right now. It won't last long. We have no second look today. It all looks pretty much the same, no matter how you turn.
Yesterday I learned a new word, "spoonie." I was reading someone's blog who used it a couple of times, but the context did not make it clear. My first impulse was to assume to assume it was a term from the drug culture--and if not that, from sex-and-intimacy culture. But it turned out it was neither. It comes from this article by Christine Miserandino. Go ahead. Read it. It's not long. And then come back.
A few years ago, I ran into a brick wall on my motor scooter, was thrown off, tumbled, and while nothing was broken, I was severely strained and sprained in my lower limbs, and they never have been quite as strong since. I don't think the accident was the cause, but it was certainly a turning point in my overall health and I have had chronic pain and fatigue. Someone I used to walk with on lunch periods (2 miles 3-5x a week on the school track) tells me I changed after that. I wonder if I may have an undiagnosed fatigue condition. But I'll probably never know since I'll probably never talk to a doctor about it. Even so, this article gives great insight into understanding people who have limited energy stores.
There have only been two other times in my life when I encountered a articulated analogy that fit me perfectly. Number one was as a college freshman I first heard a 15-minute commentary on libertarianism and anarchy by KPFK radio personality Lowell Ponte, and I found my philosophical identity. Number two was being sent a Meyers-Briggs report by a researcher who had selected me as a subject in his study of third-party political candidates, and I found I was an INTJ temperament. I do not have enough pain or limited stamina like a lupus or fibromyalgia sufferer to qualify myself as a "spoonie," but I think I'm on the way when you get to a point, like I have, where you think about the energy toll that preparing a simple meal will have on you and what you do the rest of the day (it's supposed to resupply you, not deplete you, it's perverse).
As "negative" as this revelation seems, it's really blessing when this coincidence of the outer world and your soul occurs. There are numerous folktales and stories that make a plot point of when a character meets a mage or a mentor or an enemy, and that person speaks the character's "true name." You hear that name as an outsider and you think "Big deal! That's not such a great name. 'Sparrowhawk?' The hell!" There is no ceremony for it. There is no sacred ritual though in invented stories, the authors create them. In real life, you're working one day in your job, and then Jesus comes by and says your name, and then you change.
Anyway, if you have unlimited energy stores, I envy you all. But now that I have a frame of reference, I can stop beating myself up about not fixing all the holes in the ceiling that I should, and start to budget the true cost, and eventually work up to such tasks and not feel guilty because I just didn't have enough spoons saved up. So cut slack to the people in your life who have chronic conditions. I used to not do so, and to all of you, I'm sorry.
Have a wonderful, productive weekend.
Love,
Pops
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Be truthful and frank, but be polite. If you use excessive profanity, I'll assume you have some kind of character flaw like Dr. Wong. Tks!